Three Chicks, Two Dogs, Power Tools, a Trailer, and a Shiny .38

So, there we were - cruising along the Parks (and the Glenn) Highway...  This sentence could have been uttered every five minutes a few weekends ago.  Seriously, I'm not sure you can make this shit stuff up.  We took a road trip up north to find antiques and pieces for our new shop.  We sort of had a plan, but just kind of wanted to wing it and make our final destination stop in Talkeetna.  We loaded up the dogs; Tank and Peyton along with us, because they are entertaining and they sleep all day anyway. 

The black cloud of gloom was floating over our heads before we even left town...a few hours later than planned.  To begin with, I didn't bother worrying about a trailer to haul said "junk" until four hours before the scheduled departure.  Moniker saved me by finding a quick and easy U-Haul rental.  We were running late because the "Sober September Sisters" had to get their cocktails together, but mostly because I couldn't find all of my necessary power tools.  You never know when you're going to have to take some shit apart.  In the delayed departure stage, the U-Haul rental place called me twice to get my ETA because her "daughter was hungry" and she wanted to close up - at four in the afternoon.  WTH?  By the time we finally get there and checked in, we realize that we don't have the right hitch (how dumb am I).  We go through the rigmarole and get hooked up, then realize we don't have the right adapter for the lights.  Holy schnikes!  By this time, I've already realized that I DO NOT know how to back a trailer up.  Awesome.  Good thing the trailer is itty-bitty. 

Two hours later, we're on the open road. By this time, I need a beer...but we still have an hour to go and I have a gun in the rig...you know, just in case we encounter some wildlife?  Beer would have to wait.  First stop, some little antique and clothing shops - fun stuff.  Then we hook up with a chick we found on craigslist earlier in the day.  "Um yeah, we'll meet you in a parking lot on a secluded road."  We've got the shiny .38, so we should be fine.  She's cool and we buy her truck full of stuff.  She wants to know what's going on in Talkeetna...is she missing a junk show?! Then she becomes my new best friend, texting me other items.  Awesome!  I'm actually surprised she and the skeleton didn't meet us up there for junking around.  But seriously, I'll find her again...she got me a Thor's hammer that made my day.

Then we hit our favorite store in Palmer - Pom-Pom's.  If you haven't been there - go - promise you will LOVE it!  They have fabulous, wonderful, shiny things and they offer cotton candy when you walk in the door.  We shop until they close...filling our rig with fabulous goodies!  But...by this time, we've decided it's time for cocktails so we head to our friend's house in Big Lake.  Along the way we stop at a gas station to get some delicious beer and whatnot.  Princess Sister-Pants is offended by some dude with a BIG trailer because he scoffs at our itty-bitty trailer.  I hitched my britches up , straightened up my pink toolbelt, and prepared to take the redneck on, but decided if wasn't worth it.  Besides, I'm thirsty.  And we're off again...holy BFE...again, good thing the trailer is itty-bitty and thankful that they have a giant driveway.  You know by now that I'm not backing the trailer out!

We finally arrive in BFE.  Our friend's hubby is mixing up moonshine home-made vodka.  No kidding, that stuff could peel the paint off the walls.  We catch up with our lovely friend; Bald Eagle while enjoying cocktails late into the night.  When I've had my fill, I try to get Tank into the bedroom I'm sleeping in, but he won't go.  He will bark at me and run away, but he's not going in.  So, I get to sleep on the couch with Tank breathing in my face. Awesome.  I finally give in at 6AM, get the princesses moving, and we're off on a day of adventure.

At this point, I'm ready to find some entertaining junk!  We arrive in Talkeetna, what a fun town!  The girls LOVE Talkeetna...something to do with the Wilderness Women contest and delicious bachelor auction every winter. At any rate, we get to eat some grub - family style at the Roadhouse. I introduce myself to Tricia, the new owner and inquire about junk places.  Tricia has the answer - Wal-Mikes in Trapper Creek - "can't miss it" she says.  If you've been there, you know what this entails. 

Tricia is correct, you cannot miss this place.  It's like a bomb went off and all of this shit landed on the side of the highway.  It's the length of a football field and looks like it might be full of treasures.  The first thing we notice is the propane smell...he's bleeding off a tank and it reeks.  The first thing he says is "I'd better get a torch and go burn some of that off".  Yeeeah, can you wait until we're clear of the area.  We set to picking through the stuff, LOTS of it!  Dozens of tires, wheels, old windows & doors, rusty iron, old toolboxes, boat windows, license plates, etc.    We get ourselves a pile and ask Wal-Mike to give us the skinny.  He hems and haws..."that's not for sale, that's from a Model T" (why the hell is out here then, decoration?), "oh, that's my potato picking basket...that was in my living space" (you live outside on the fence??), "oh, I don't know what that is, but I sure hope I don't need it" (WTF?!).  Seriously, you can't make this shit up.  Finally we settle on a price for all of the goodies and we get to go inside his "store".  His wife is behind a curtain yelling at him, he's yelling back.  We wait quietly trying to ignore the angry stickers he has posted, the crazy beaver pelts staring us in the face, and his indifference.  Then he follows us outside to watch us load up, I'm sure he doesn't want us stealing his goods! 

The next stop was scheduled to be some place at Mile 49 on the Parks, but we get sidetracked by an "Around the World Sale" at a storage facility.  We pull into the lot and look around...then some woman comes out and waves us over to this little cabin. Seriously, what could be worldly inside this 15' x 15' cabin?  We should have gone with our instincts.  Her bed is set up in the middle of the room and we realize that we're in her living space.  There are small random things sitting around with price tags and the only "worldly" things in the cabin are a couple of pieces of jewelry.  She has to tell us all about the jewelry and says she'll let us look around, but she comes right back into our bubble.  "Oh, there are some great kids books here...only a quarter".  I spot a typewriter and decide I need it.  She has it marked at $35 and I ask if she'll take $30.  "Gee, I'd reeeeally like $35...and I will throw in these office supplies".  No shit, they were old manila folders papered clipped together, a bundle of pens with marketing on them, and a three ring binder.  Um, no thanks - we're good with only the typewriter.
Upon pulling out of the "around the world" sale, we spot an incredible sight...it's like a shanty-town on the side of the highway with little cabins PILED with junk!  Apparently the locals call it Skid Row...that's about right.  We locate a particularly special pile of junk and explore.  The sweet lady covered in grime offered to show us all sorts of goodies, but I was more interested in the iron on the ground behind an Alice Cooper look-alike.  He was just sorting junk and drinking good ol' Busch Light...right there on the side of the road.  Only in Wasilly.  I'll leave out the filthy details, but we scored some cool stuff and hauled ass...wishing the whole time that we had hand sanitizer.

Our next few stops were uneventful, but we'll just tell you that we had to have a cookie at the Sandwich Shop and we scored on some very special items at another shop.  As we're high-fiving and getting the hell out of the valley, something goes very wrong.  We're moving along the highway at a normal pace when the TINY trailer starts wobbling and trying to come loose.  I don't know how, but we somehow maneuvered off the highway without the trailer getting away and injuring someone else.  Just as we're slowing to a stop, the TINY trailer comes smashing into the back of my rig.  My stomach drops and I don't have the heart to get out to survey the damage.  After a few minutes of "holy shit" and "OMG" comments, we get out.  Unbelievable, but there is absolutely NO damage to my rig...not a scratch, nothing.  The trailer, on the other hand, has a nice 3" square in it.  Turns out the hitch (purchased 24 hours earlier) has failed.

Hubby is out of town, so we call everyone that we think can help.  Finally, our adorable pregnant friend jumps on it and brings us a new hitch.  Two hours later, we're fixed up.  The girls had a couple bottles of champagne and cat naps while waiting.  Thank goodness I purchased the insurance!

By the time we get home, a gaggle of chicks is waiting for us to re-hash the events of the last 24 hours.  Many beverages were consumed and some work was done...

As for the shop, you'll have to read about that in another post.