The Teacher's Note

So...we received a fun "Incident Report" from school yesterday. Apparently, the Pickle and her BFF, Cakes refused to line up after outside time and hid from the teacher...for fifteen minutes causing safety issues. I don't doubt that the dynamic duo was pulling such a stunt, we can even imagine them giggling in a corner, pretending to hide. As a parent, this is terrifying in a public setting and we've discussed the consequences before. At school, in a fenced-in area, with ten other threenagers; I would imagine it's aggravating as hell. Plus, the incident report noted that it was 12:10PM...lunch time. I know I'm hangry around that time. When I read the note, a distant memory from sixth grade popped into my mind.

My cousin and I were a couple of troublemakers when we were together, which is why they probably tried to put us in different classes. One particular day, we were lined up to go inside after recess and Gerber decided to start picking at us. Or we were picking at him...literally can't remember the details, but I clearly remember the teacher yelling at us to get to the principal's office. We stopped giggling immediately and marched in there. Mr. Baker, our esteemed principal, looked at us, put his hand to his forehead, and said "I've had it up to here with you two {last name}'s!" I remember thinking it was funny...and knowing me I laughed. Probably got into more trouble, but the look from the Papa would be worse when I got home. Flash forward ten years and my Dad admitted that he went to high school with said principal and may have beat him up? So...technically, only 99% of that scolding was directed at us girls, the other 1%...that's on my Dad. HA!

Pool party for EVERYONE! Anna & Elsa are sunbathing in the corner...

At any rate, we discussed listening with the Pickle last night and came to the conclusion that yes, they were stinkers...but she's THREE. Which doesn't exempt her from following rules, being kind, or listening - but she has many more years of memory-making, trouble-making, mistake-making, etc. ahead of them. Then we had a pool party, because 80` on an long Alaskan summer day is magical.

I made el husbando drop Pickle off at school this morning and asked how it went. He went all creative on me and dropped this line...names have been changed, in the spirit of not being a complete asshole parent.

"Wednesday Morning Showdown: I dropped off the young squirt this morning and there was “Mona”!  I stared at her with my meanest glare as I walked over to her.  I figured this was my best approach to create fear in her.  It didn’t work.  She started talking to Bryce in her annoying high pitch fake voice... Pickle wanted nothing to do with her so I took her upstairs with me to put her backpack away.  When I came back down, there was “Teacher of the year nominee” Mona.  I was going to have a chat with her but I switched gears and thought a nice approach would be the best medicine.  I asked her if we could donate a couple fans for the classroom.  I thought she was going to give me a hug.  She told me that she’s the oldest teacher (no shit…duh) and the two fans would be a blessing!  I told her no worries while thinking…donating 2 fans was better than putting my thumb in her eye!

I did speak with B-Dog (second teacher).  She said kids will be kids and it was really not a big deal."

The fact that he took a "nice" approach was pretty hilarious. What was he going to do, beat up a teacher who deals with TEN three year olds all day? Like she doesn't need a good ol' shot of vodker when she goes home. Or perhaps she should write a book, her heated incident report was very descriptive.

Happy Hump Day!